Frames

Oops.  I was going to put up another post and ended up almost deleting yesterday's, so I put it back up, but yesterday's post also has today's date...pretend it says, "October 22, 2010", okay?

Most Sunday mornings, I find myself flying around trying to get ready for church (well, for my ride to church), so by the time I leave, I'm a bit harried and out of sorts.  We do pray in the car before we go, but I must confess, sometimes my spirit isn't really ready to slow down and ask for God's blessing on that day.

So the past few weeks, I've made sure I'm completely ready by 30 mins. before my ride comes--well, last week, it was 25--to calm down and get in the frame of mind where I am actually ready to "get God" at church (I heard another preacher using that expression, and I really liked it, so I adopted it).  But last week, although I'd had this extra time before church, I found myself "losing it" anyway when under pressure.

This morning, I read a little of the Word, talked with God about it a real little bit...then found myself spending twenty minutes writing in my journal about it.  Well, God knows how my mind is "prone to wander, Lord, I feel it".  I had to slam on the mental brakes right in the middle of writing.  I realized I was simply writing down all the analyzing I had done and all the conclusions I had reached, actually was no longer looking at God at all!  Take time to calm down? " 笑わせないでよ！ (Don't make me laugh!)", I wrote in my notebook, and closed it; I had instead been working myself up, not quieting my heart in any way!

No wonder, I realized.  No wonder I thought I had that time last week to get settled down and determine to keep my eyes fastened on God all day but lost it before lunch; I had actually conditioned myself to fly off the handle!

The only way God can really communicate to us what He wants is if we're completely quiet...then we can hear His still, small voice.  I guess I had forgotten it isn't called "Quiet Time" for nothing.  I had been focusing on only the aspect of relishing "dating" time just with me and God, calling it "Garden Time".  That aspect is important too, but sometimes I need to remember God goes "shhhhhhhhh" and wants me to stop squirming and chattering for awhile.

Well, one of the things I learned this week was from Tozer's explanation of the expression, "I dare not trust the sweetest frame," in the hymn, "The Solid Rock". He said it's referring to a frame of mind!  I used to think it was talking about leaning on solid framework or standing on a sure foundation.


...I'm not really sure how that thought occurred to me to be able to tie it in with what I was saying earlier, because I wasn't in any sweet frame of mind to not dare trust...